Ambling Ahead

One of my, let's call them quirks, is that I follow the eliminations on lots of reality tv shows I don't watch. (I also follow the TWoP recaplets of certain non-reality shows I don't watch, but less frequently.)

Anyhoo, I watched the last 10 minutes of American Idol (the only time I've watched this season) to see if super-frontrunner Adam would actually win. When he didn't, I said loudly (to myself), "Oh, dude!"

(By the way, that "Oh, dude!" really means "Oh crap, how many pop culture ramblings am I about to read about how Adam lost due to the gay factor?" For what it's worth, I subscribe to a more general "voting bloc" theory.)

Then I watched one of my actual reality shows, Make Me a Supermodel, and Salome got kicked off! (Since you don't watch this show, I'll tell you that she's the mega-hot former Mennonite who kept winning the photo shoots despite having an actual butt.) And, natch, I said, "Oh, dude!" Because apparently that is what I say to these things.

Yes, I am that exciting.

PS: Australia's Next Top Model. Love it! Bogans!

Hey, what are you doing 8 days from now?

Because I will be graduating that weekend and my parents and stepparents are all coming to town. Some of you have met them, some of you have only heard the legends.

I am scheduling an early dinner out on Saturday (5/16) and then will probably have them hang out at my apartment.

So, if you are interested in celebrating with me, or just gawking at the craziness of those four people in a confined space, let me know.

I'll provide refreshments.

1. Bye bye three grand. Did my final review of my taxes and submitted them. Alas.

2. On the plus side, I have a job interview Friday, at one of the federal agencies I'm interested in. Woot. I will tell you more after the fact.

3. I finally found adult gummy vitamins!

4. Oh! A sign of how effed up this semester has been: I wore contacts today, including during my capstone meeting. And as we were walking to the metro, one of my teammates asked me if I'd just gotten contacts. I had to explain that I've actually worn them since age 11 (due to my inability to keep glasses clean and unbroken) and that I've only been wearing glasses lately because my eyes are always bothering me (because I sleep for shit).

5. Both my boss and my boyfriend have been all, "You know you have to dress up for this interview, right?" And I've had to say: Look dudes, I own fancy pants suits and non-flipflop shoes. I just don't like them. How about you give me the teensiest bit of credit?

And...

6. I graduate May 17. Which means, after May 17 I will have some celebrating to do. Probably some nerd movie night-ing to do. Perhaps even some I-work-9-to-5-and-have-health-insurance celebrating to do. Wouldn't that be nuts?

(Not that I'm betting on this job or anything...)

Periodically, I try to remove some stuff from the Tivo. You know, so my Real Housewives of NYC episodes don't get deleted too quickly. Anyhoo, I'm now watching a The Office episode from two years ago.  It's a damn good episode that I have enjoyed several times. I know I should delete it, but there is this anthropological thrill of seeing commercials from two years ago. In particular, this insane TLC spot that features ornaments for the "life lessons collection," such as the "he wants you to be his mom, but you don't want to be his girlfriend lesson." I don't remember ever seeing this commercial when it aired, but it's awesomely weird. There's also a 30 Rock spot about Liz Lemon being "Professionally gifted, romantically challenged" which I do kinda remember, and this was probably around the time I started watching the show. And man, they used to dress Liz way shlubier. Kinda more like me, actually...

So yeah, I don't think I can delete the episode now. Also, I have a Joan of Arcadia episode from four fucking years ago, and I bet those commercials are sweeeeet.

Why yes, I am cool, why do you ask?

Chris just sent me an email: "What are we doing tonight, Brain?"

I about died laughing. But I think he's right: we're exactly like these guys. Except I am taller and far less ambitious.

I got some super-awesome news from friends today. So good, in fact, that I'm still smiling hours later. And it's definitely more important than my stupid financial woes. So you know what? Bank account: down. Life: up.

Woot!

We interrupt the usual "oh crap, can't get a job" news to present this fun fact: I owe slightly more than $3,000 in taxes. Let's just call this a significant portion of my savings.

FUCKING AWESOME.

Here's how this happened: I get a stipend through school that comes without tax withheld. So I have to pay the taxes on it now. Fine, not a surprise. But I also spent a buttload on medical expenses last year (since I have to pay my own really high insurance premium), and had read in the tax code that I could deduct the portion of this that was over 7.5% of adjusted gross income. Great, thought I, that will counteract some of those other taxes I have to pay. This knowledge kept me from having a nervous breakdown over my medical bills.

Interrupting to say: Did you know the US tax code is totally complicated?  I knew this, and yet...

Guess who doesn't get ANY of that medical money back? Because the standard deduction is higher than my itemized deduction (the one that would include the medical crap). So: bupkis. Unless I'm plugging things into the tax program wrong, which...is entirely possible, but if so, I won't figure it out. ETA: Nope, I was right the first time.

Fan-fucking-tastic.

Chistopher, you're on notice: I'm not paying for anything more expensive than McDonald's for the time being.

What in the world made me think I could do cost-benefit analysis? This whole semester is made of fail. Good thing it's not my last one...oh wait, crap.

Bobby Jindal seems like a nice guy, but I think he's actually Kenneth the Page. Folksy!

ETA: Not just me then.

Fellow super-nerd Tina Fey presented at the Oscars. What was I doing? Hanging out at Lindsey's for most of it. (Dear Lindsey, dude, I seriously wish I cooked like you. Speaking as Chris' concubine, I know of what I speak.) But then I came home to my mac acting a fool. Stupid computer. Stop flickering at me menacingly. What the H will I do if my shitacular documents go missing forever? How will the world live without my genius? Urgh...yeah...dear power cord, stop flickering before I punch you in the face. Blurgh.